It Gets Better

I’ve been on-line dating for over a month now… and it does get better!

Okay, when I say “it gets better”, I don’t mean that all of the sudden I’ve found the secret formula to attract the right guy, but I say “it gets better” in that I have so much more to share with y’all!

What's your number babe at Did That Just Happen Blog

What’s your number babe

For real?

And the transition right to “well, let’s hang out then”.

I sent back a page of my schedule that ended with basically, it’s a month before I’ll have any free time.  And I fully expected that to be the end of him.

It wasn’t.

The guy went on to ask me 5,000,000,000 questions.

I’m not even exaggerating!

But, it gets better!

A few days later he messages me again… and very obviously isn’t paying a bit of attention.

Good to Know at Did That Just Happen Blog

Good to know?  Good to know?  What part of I was sick was good to know?  I don’t even have an answer for that one!

Yeah, no.  I just can’t even.

But wait – it gets better.

Enter a new beau.  And he falls under the category of “Did you just say that?”  I mean, I can’t tell you how long I stared at his message in disbelief.  It’s not so much whether or not you have religious beliefs, it was just the disrespect he has towards those that do.  Take a look.  Did he say that at Did That Just Happen Blog

I sent back to him that I found that comment out of line and didn’t want that attitude in my life.  To which he responded “Ok”.

See – I told you it got better!!! I don’t think you can top these!  But, rest assured, my fingers are in top form for taking screen shots just in case someone comes along who can top these!!

Speaking of top form – I do have a race this weekend.  A 5k for the college my son attends, the alumni put it on every year, and I’m happy to be able to participate! I am not racing this one, I’m just having fun with it, so I hope to take lots of pictures – the school had a poster making day – and I can’t wait to see what they came up with! I’ve been staying at my parents house this week, and they say that hills make you stronger – but I swear the hills in my parents neighborhood are out to kill me.

 

I Just Deleted 102 Emails

Not even kidding, 102 emails! That was insane!

If you are just joining us, my boyfriend is moving away and I’ve decided that I enjoyed dating him and want to keep dating – and in this day and age, that means, say it with me:

online dating at Did That Just Happen Blog

That’s right, Online Dating

I spent the weekend on-line reading every “Top 10 On-Line Dating Sites” article that I could find.

First off, I had no clue there were so many dating sites, and secondly, I had no clue how many articles had been written about them!!! I think my eyes started bleeding at one point, but I read them all!

Okay, no I didn’t, I read about 5 of them, figured that would give me a good sample!!

Now, I new I was ruling out E-Harmony, even though it frequently ranks at the top of the charts, it is more money than I’m willing to invest right now, and I did try that in the past – like 10 years ago – and the form you fill out took me three days!  I’m not willing to invest that much time right now, either! Just keeping it real, I want to date, but apparently I don’t want to put in 3 days worth of effort!!

little kid lover online dating at Did That Just Happen Blog

My first priority was looking at low cost/free sites.  I know that you run a risk on those of weeding through more weirdo’s, but considering this is my first time to really dive in and mean it – I consider this my wading pool.  I want to get my feet wet and not commit to the deep end just yet.

I narrowed it down.  Found the site that fit my requirements and spent the time filling out my info, answering their questions and before I could even finish setting up my profile, already I was getting dings!

Okay, I am totally committed to this.  I am going to keep an open mind and be engaging and friendly and yes, I am going to accept dates and meet strangers.

And just pray that they don’t shove me in the trunk of their car and kidnap me.

dating is cool at Did That Just Happen Blog

I have since updated my settings so that I don’t get an email every time a message or “like” comes in. It took me several minutes to get rid of all 102 emails! 🙂  Lesson learned!

So, does anyone have good on-line dating stories? Don’t tell me anything that will freak me out!!

Running is hit and miss.  Not sure why I’ve struggled lately, okay, yes I do.  I know exactly why I struggled.  I had been over-training.  I have forced myself to slow down, cut back on my mileage again and stop obsessing over the training plan!  Well, the problem is that I followed the training plan… and then kept adding in my own miles on top of those… thus the injury and the struggle bus coming by to pick me up!  “Slow and Steady wins the Race” is my new motto currently!

Save

The Day I Said a Bad Word

There are two things y’all need to know about me.

First, I don’t use much bad language.  I’ve seen all the meme’s:

People who curse at Did That Just Happen Blog

But I’m from the school of thought that is more:

Intelligent people do not use profanity at Did That Just Happen Blog

(and the “-Me” credited in that quote is not Me, I found that on the internet and couldn’t track it back to the original source!  If you said this, let me know!)

And the second thing you need to know about me is:

I keep your number in my phone so I know not to answer at Did That Just Happen Blog

Yes, I’m that person!

Now that you know these two things… let me tell you how they relate.  And if foul language offends you, well, you shouldn’t have clicked on this blog when it is clearly about a day I said a bad word!

So…

The other day I got a text from my buddy, Bert.

Bad Word Day

So, that happened. My phone betrayed me.  It accidentally Face Time’d my Ex.

And I said a really bad word!!

And while I’m saying all the bad words in my head, I am sending my Ex a text and literally it says

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to call you, I was asking Siri to beatbox for me!”

Because that doesn’t sound fake AT ALL!!! 

But, he called, and I answered, and I kid you not, told me all about his day – like it hadn’t been years since we had talked!  Like it hadn’t been years since we had talked and he had said he was going to call.  And never did!

Okay, so this is my Ex from a long time ago, and while we weren’t together long, it was an intense relationship, and while I had the utmost respect for him, he and I both will admit that towards the end, well, we were young, tempers were strong.

For the most part, it’s been fine.  We work in the same industry but not in the same State (most of the time) and while we have run into each other at functions, it is rare.

And let me tell you, I swear I could be a secret agent, I am awesome at ducking and eluding capture!!

At least, I am, until my phone decides to betray me!!!! 

Back to the story.  My phone betrayed me.  I talked to my Ex.

For like an hour.

He wants to mend our relationship.

Not get back together, I was able to determine that in that phone call, but just to mend our relationship.

Dean Winchester says no at Did That Just Happen blog

I know that inside my head I was reacting like Dean Winchester – “no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no no.  No, no. No”

What came out was “Sure, uh, let me process all this, but I can be open to it”

So that just happened.  And so far I’ve been really grown up about it.  A few friends that I’ve talked to have commented at how grown up I’ve been and how I’ve been handling it so very well, really mature about the whole thing actually.

I changed the ring tone for my Ex to dogs barking… cause he could still be a dog!

But no one needs to know that!!! 🙂

 

 

 

I May Have to Rethink My Entire Life

Have you ever seen the movie “Something to Talk About” with Julia Roberts and Dennis Quaid? It’s set in the South, and one part of the movie has always stuck out of me.  (But apparently it didn’t stick out for the thousands of YouTubers out there as I couldn’t find a clip, but I found this one, and it pretty much sums up the entire movie!)

The scene: a group of Southern Ladies are sitting in a room having their Junior League meeting and discussing the annual cookbook fundraiser.

  • (Junior League President) On to the business of our centennial cookbook.  Wee want it to be our best… so I’ll ask our committee chairman to bring us up to date.
  • (Committee chairwoman) Deadline for recipe submissions is the second.  Think about substituting vegetable shortening wherever it says lard.  I say this because Nell McGee’s husband is recovering from heart surgery.  Lucy’s going to take over for me until after the Grand Prix.  That’s it.
  • (Committee member)-Names
  • (another committee member)-Right
  • (Committee chairwoman) The committee thinks that… Well, we’ve looked at a lot of other cookbooks.  We’ve always been listed with our married names under the recipes.  Frankly, the practice of excluding our first names looks outdated.  So, I think we should list our names: First, middle and last.  That’s all.
  • (Edna) I’ve always thought the way it was looked quaint.
  • (Edna’s friend) It doesn’t look quaint Edna, it looks antiquated.
  • (Edna’s other friend) What about tradition? If my name isn’t there as Mrs. Frankin J. Caldwell III… then how the hell is anybody gonna know who I am? Barbaranelle Caldwell, who’s that?

It cracked me up, because there are some traditions that took longer to break, down here in the South, than others.  Even my mom mentioned the other day that when she was first married, she signed Mrs. John Doe, instead of Mrs. Jane Doe.  So even in my life time, it was not uncommon for that practice!

I always assumed when I got married, I would take my husbands name, it’s just what is done.

Then life happened.

I became a single mother and enrolled my kid in school.  And realized that life was so much easier having the same last name.  And I have worked very hard for my last name.  I’ve been in the same industry for almost 20 years, everyone knows me by my last name.  There is no way I want to change that – nor have a different last name than my son.

I mentioned at a lunch meeting the other day, that should I get married, at this point, I’d keep my last name.  I’d consider the hyphen, but that would just be to compromise.  I’d want to keep my name professionally.

Imagine my surprise when he immediately said “I couldn’t marry someone that wouldn’t take my name.”

The reaction I get when I say I won't change my name after marriage | Did That Just Happen Blog

Really?  Like for real?

Huh.

That was interesting, and he is a younger guy, a new generation, I assumed he would be more progressive than that.

Which led me to a conversation with a good friend, and we were discussing marriage, as he’s in a committed relationship, but isn’t looking to get married – but his girlfriend is! I brought up my lunch conversation from a few days prior, and darned if he didn’t immediately have the same reaction!

He could totally see why I’d keep my last name on the professional side.  And he understood wanting to save the hassle and having the same last name as Mr. T.  But he, too, couldn’t marry someone who wouldn’t take his name.

So, I brought up the hyphen.

To which a visceral response happened! He said that he didn’t know why, and he couldn’t control it, but the moment he saw a woman with a hyphenated last name, his first thought was “b$t@#”.

How do you react when a woman doesn't change her last name when getting married? |Did That Just Happen Blog

He couldn’t explain it, it was just his automatic response.

So, I asked, but then would you be willing to adopt Mr. T? Because that has to be a valid reason, and he said “Of course, in a heart beat a kid like him I’d adopt.”

Okay, so that’s totally where I expected the hurdle to be, but adoption was a non-issue.

The not-changing-my-name, however, was a deal breaker.

Now, before you shake your head and think I’ve lost my mind, I recognize that some of my issues are really non-issues at this point.  Mr. T is older, and so having the same last name for school and medical reasons doesn’t really apply anymore, but when he was younger, it was pretty legitimate!

I just love those moments when you get an insight into the other side of a thought! I had been so sure of my path until those two conversations – and now, well now I get to rethink!

I Need My Space

R1-05250-000A_0001

My son had that talk with me this weekend.

“Speaking of our adventures, I think you need to have some without me.”

… (insert deadly silence from me here)…

“I think that I need some space, you know, to hang out with my friends-“

“when have I ever stopped you from hanging with your friends?!?”

“I’m not saying you have, I’m just letting you know that as an example.”

I’m not going to lie, I was blindsided by the conversation, but I was really proud of the way he approached it and the way he handled himself.  He went on to state that he was growing and was ready for some time on his own.

I’m so very proud of the man he’s becoming and feel really good that I’ve raised him to want to spread his wings.

But he’s nuts if he thinks I’m letting him go just yet!

017f78a63a907544edfd4483ab02876657282a619e