Double Standard Anyone?

This weekend my reality was challenged.  It was very hard to let go and NOT have a double standard… In fact, these are the words that came out of my mouth “Well, if you were gay, I’d let you do it – so I don’t really have a reason why you can’t do it since you are straight.”

I didn’t have a valid argument.  This was a situation that in my mind shouldn’t happen because “you are a guy”.

And, it’s true, but not valid!

Here’s a hint:

hot pink pedicure

Now, let’s back up and get the rest of the story!

Kate and Mr T

First, we’ll start with a gratuitous shot of me and Mr. T – He’s in his Easter outfit thanks to Grammy and Papa – and just looking so handsome!

Really, there was no point to the inclusion of that picture!

Now onto the story, a few days ago My Amy texted me and the conversation went something like this:

Winter sucks

Yes, it does!

Haven’t seen you in forever!

I know, but I think the sun is coming out, so I’ll probably be leaving the house soon!

We should get together… want to do something this weekend?

Sounds great!

Want to go across the border?

Cha-ching!  Of course I do… because just across the border is where you’ll find the casino! She had to work that morning, and I was volunteering at the food co-op mid-morning, so we met at my place at noon, went and picked up another friend and took off!

Winstar or bust!

FREEDOM!!!

It was so much fun! We walked the length of the casino and then back again, trying different machines along the way and just catching up with each other!

Casino bird kept taking my money!

I would like to say I was strategic and parlayed my small pocket change into a large fund; however, I wasn’t strategic! And, no, the casino didn’t end up giving me a big check; however, I won enough to make me a very happy camper!

I told Mr. T that I’d be paying off our weekend fun, but that we should do something special together with the leftovers!

He picked pedicures.

Mother and son pedicures

It was a good idea, there is something about being in those chairs that invites conversation, and really, who doesn’t love a good foot massage! As we were sitting there, he looks at me and goes “Can I get a color?”

No, of course you can’t get a color.  You. Are. A. Boy.

That’s what I said in my head.  Actually, I may have screamed it in my head!

What came out was “If you want.”

I grew up in a culture where boys didn’t wear polish.

But, my parents grew up in a culture where boys didn’t wear earrings and that never phased me. Mr. T got his ears pierced at a young age.  He doesn’t wear them often now; however, that never bothered me.

So, maybe I’m old fashioned.  Maybe I need to be the one to loosen up and let it go.

And, I’m not kidding, I told Mr. T that if he was gay, I’d totally understand him wanting polish – so I didn’t have a reason for saying no just because he was straight.

Then Mr. T goes “Can I get hot pink?”

Go big or go home, I guess.

hot pink pedicure

And that’s how I ended up with a son with hot pink toes sitting next to me at the nail salon.

And that’s how I ended up struggling with the double standard.

It was hard letting him walk out the door this morning.  But really, is there a valid argument?

Because it isn’t societal norm. Because I’m not comfortable with it.  Because it isn’t done.

None of that is valid.

None of those statements represent the person I want to be.

On one hand, it’s outside my comfort zone.  On the other hand, I’m so proud of that kid for being who he wants and not being bound by societal norm.

Yes, it’s a double standard, and yes, sometimes I still struggle with it.

But this morning, I was the person I wanted to be and I watched my son walk out the door with hot pink toe nails being the person he wants to be.

And I smiled, ’cause yeah, that just happened.

Where Does the Time Go?

To all of you who blog every day, who have a blogging schedule and stick to it, and actually create worthwhile posts: You are such an inspiration!

I wish I could. I would love to entertain you with my life in a daily basis; however, my life really isn’t that entertaining and guys, I just don’t have time! I don’t know how you do it!

I got this idea from Not A Punk Rocker (and I hope that really links up) where she cleaned out her cell phone photos. I enjoyed her post and thought it was cool, so I decided to try it, too! Plus, it means I can post content that I don’t have to give a lot of thought to. Yup, sometimes I’m just lazy!

So, here is my cheat post!

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Happy Valentines Day! I actually just saw this on Facebook a few minutes ago and took a screen shot. I’m not sure who it is for, but figured if better make a copy just in case. And look, now I got to share it all with you!

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I saw this the other day and was like “what the what?!?” And “why?!?”

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Here is everything that came in my Bountiful Basket! $15 for all of those fruits and veggies, and supporting a local co-op! I’m super happy and will be doing it again this week! 🙂

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Here is my sons current hair cut. Yup. That happened. But you should know all of the haircuts I vetoed! And yes, the front half is missing, too. He is bald only on one side.

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This is my bruise. I like to take picture and share how hurt I am! 🙂 Now I’m wishing I had more of these so I could show you the progression!

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Now, these are my types of conversation hearts!!

Okay, there is a stroll through my phone pictures from the past week. I hope you enjoyed them and that this post bought me some time before I have to come up with a “real” post!

Mommy Guilt – A Guest Post

I’m so excited!  Jess at Waiting on a Word was kind enough to host me as a guest blogger today!  Please go check her out!  It’s a pretty awesome post, if I do say so myself!

My life has been busy. I’m not saying it’s been harder than anyone’s, but just to point out that I’ve been busy! You know that kinda busy where when you get a free moment and you’re afraid that you’ve totally forgotten something you were supposed to do and that’s why all of the sudden you have free time!

The point of this is that today I went for my monthly pedicure. Several years ago I decided that the approximately $30 a month was worth having an hour alone. I don’t do a lot for just me as I am very family and friend focused; however, I love having my toes done. I love the feel and how pretty they look at the end of the hour. I love the massage chair and I love the foot rub that comes with it. I love that for one hour every month I don’t have to worry about anything. Everything will be waiting on me when the hour is up, so I can let it all go and just enjoy an hour of me time and a little pampering!

moms

Okay – go visit Jess to finish the post!  It’s well worth it! (in my very humble opinion! 🙂 )

Failed!

Today I totally failed at my goal to not compare myself to others.  I fully expect to say this many times over; however, I have to share this one with you!  A dear friend of mine, Karaboo, gave me a pay-it-forward gift.  I still have yet to find the right words to thank her for it, I’m just shocked and honored and humbled by it.  

Karaboo gave me laser hair treatment.  Yup, you read that right, laser hair treatment.  Now, most pay-it-forward’s that you hear about sound more touching and heartwarming – like the Secret Santa’s that hit Kmart and paid off peoples layaway accounts.  Or the person who walks by and drops a quarter in the meter that’s about to expire on the street, you know those stories.  

Before you judge, let me tell you that this is something I have wanted since it was invented. This is something that I would never be able to get for myself.  Something that I would never get for myself.  I feel guilty for the $30 – $37 I spend every month on my pedicure (I have finally decided that it’s okay, and that it’s worth the time and money to have an hour alone to myself once a month, it helps me be a better mom.) Okay, enough of my neuroses.  The point is, this was the most awesome of gifts and I in turn will, in the future, bless someone else in their life.  

Back to my story of failure.  Today was my second treatment.  I got in the chair and let the technician get to work.  She asked me about the holidays, told me about hers.  Now, here is where my total failure comes into play.  My technician is a young, beautiful woman.  Long jet black hair, beautiful body, pretty skin, great smile, funny and heart warming.  I see a girl like this and just assume that she’s the popular one, always going out and having a good time.  I completely and totally compared her to me, and since she looked so different than I did, she couldn’t be like me in any way.  Oh my goodness.  She’s a homebody.  She loves being at home.  My jaw just about hit the floor.  Yet again, I’ve been hoisted by my own petard.  

I see it as a reminder from the Universe to keep trying.  As far as reminders go, it was a pretty good one!  

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