Rule #1

It’s been a week since I started on-line dating.

It feels like it’s been forever.

I went back and looked at the calendar just to make sure.

Only a week.

I did get an email that you could get the “paid” option for 20% off.  I paid for one month and set up a reminder to cancel it!  The paid option just gives me a bit more information about who is looking at me, and allows me to look at others in “incognito” mode – meaning I can stalk research and the guys won’t know I’ve visited their profile.

Stalking is such a strong word at Did That Just happen Blog

We shall see if either of those options come in handy!

So far, the BEST opening line (with original punctuation):

Roses are red violets are blue.  Do you want a fun date or a Starbucks date for two?

Now, how do you resist that?

I responded and we’ve had some good conversations… he is 20 years younger than I am.

RULE #1: You have to be closer to my age than either my son or my parents age.

So far, the worst opening line (with original punctuation):

Good morning will you morning my beautiful city of Fort Worth Texas? You look very wonderful.  I would like to be a friend of yours with the potential of being more. I am a fun, loving down to earth type of Guyd. Contact me when you get a chance?

Okay, I am not at all sure what he was trying to say in the beginning, and was that last line really supposed to be a question?

I judge people based on grammer at Did That Just Happen BlogI didn’t respond to that one.  There are some that I just haven’t responded to, because just like the one above, it didn’t look like a real person was sending it – call it spam, catfishing, or just fishing, it takes more than that to make me bite!

So far I’ve had several great message conversations, I’ve let a couple know that I didn’t feel we were compatible, and even more that are just sitting there never to be answered!  (But I’ll leave them there so I can see if they contact me again!) (Not that I have issues or anything!) (Maybe a few!)

All in all, I feel it’s not bad for for the first week; but wow, it wears me out!! 🙂

Running is better.  I switched to a more organic training program.  Lots of tips are about “schedule” and I’ve found that I work better if I know what I want to do, and leave some flexibility about when I actually do it!  Running a 5k this weekend… can’t wait to see my time!

 

 

I Just Deleted 102 Emails

Not even kidding, 102 emails! That was insane!

If you are just joining us, my boyfriend is moving away and I’ve decided that I enjoyed dating him and want to keep dating – and in this day and age, that means, say it with me:

online dating at Did That Just Happen Blog

That’s right, Online Dating

I spent the weekend on-line reading every “Top 10 On-Line Dating Sites” article that I could find.

First off, I had no clue there were so many dating sites, and secondly, I had no clue how many articles had been written about them!!! I think my eyes started bleeding at one point, but I read them all!

Okay, no I didn’t, I read about 5 of them, figured that would give me a good sample!!

Now, I new I was ruling out E-Harmony, even though it frequently ranks at the top of the charts, it is more money than I’m willing to invest right now, and I did try that in the past – like 10 years ago – and the form you fill out took me three days!  I’m not willing to invest that much time right now, either! Just keeping it real, I want to date, but apparently I don’t want to put in 3 days worth of effort!!

little kid lover online dating at Did That Just Happen Blog

My first priority was looking at low cost/free sites.  I know that you run a risk on those of weeding through more weirdo’s, but considering this is my first time to really dive in and mean it – I consider this my wading pool.  I want to get my feet wet and not commit to the deep end just yet.

I narrowed it down.  Found the site that fit my requirements and spent the time filling out my info, answering their questions and before I could even finish setting up my profile, already I was getting dings!

Okay, I am totally committed to this.  I am going to keep an open mind and be engaging and friendly and yes, I am going to accept dates and meet strangers.

And just pray that they don’t shove me in the trunk of their car and kidnap me.

dating is cool at Did That Just Happen Blog

I have since updated my settings so that I don’t get an email every time a message or “like” comes in. It took me several minutes to get rid of all 102 emails! 🙂  Lesson learned!

So, does anyone have good on-line dating stories? Don’t tell me anything that will freak me out!!

Running is hit and miss.  Not sure why I’ve struggled lately, okay, yes I do.  I know exactly why I struggled.  I had been over-training.  I have forced myself to slow down, cut back on my mileage again and stop obsessing over the training plan!  Well, the problem is that I followed the training plan… and then kept adding in my own miles on top of those… thus the injury and the struggle bus coming by to pick me up!  “Slow and Steady wins the Race” is my new motto currently!

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A Break & Break-up

(I apologize for the email(s) you may have received yesterday that lead to a dead link, the button I wanted was right next to the “publish” button, and I totally hit the wrong button.  Twice!)

One of my favorite people told me the other day “I’m so sorry, I haven’t had time to read your blog” and I was all “That’s okay, I stopped writing it!”

And I did, and I needed the break.  I was serious when I told y’all that I wanted to live my life and not keep mental notes in my head of “Oh, I need to blog about this!”

The break did me good! But now, oh my gosh, I have stuff that has to be shared!! I mean, I would be doing every single one of you a disservice if I didn’t share it!

Last  we spoke, Mr. T had started his freshman year in college, a friend of his was borrowing our guest room and I was dating Adam.  You can catch up here if you are so inclined, but you aren’t missing anything if you don’t!

Humm… I can’t remember if I used his real name or not in my last post – but he isn’t active in social medial, so I can’t imagine it matters to him! He has social media, but he doesn’t even follow my Instagram account! Dude, we’ve been dating almost a year!

Whats up with that at Did That Just Happen Blog

But let’s move on!

Mr. T is in his 2nd semester of first year and it is just awesome! He seems to be doing so well, and he really enjoys it – and he is still cheering!  In fact, if you follow me on aforementioned IG account, you’d be over-run with pictures from the last two competitions we attended!

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It’s pretty awesome.  Both events were out of state, and I got to stay with one of my best friends in the world – it was worth the extra drive to get back and forth!

Mr. T’s friend who was borrowing the guest room moved out.

And moved back in 2 weeks later.  He is paying rent now.  We are working on getting him moving forward in his life.  He talks about all these grand plans, and I’m a task master helping to keep him on track!

Adam and I have been together almost a year – and guys, it was awesome.  It wasn’t perfect by any means, but it was a great relationship.  We were open with each other, we laughed, we adjusted and adapted.  I learned some good lessons about myself during this time.

Have you noticed that I am using the past tense?

He is moving away.  Just a few weeks shy of our 1 year anniversary, he is moving.

I’m not even upset – it’s for family, and it is the right move for him to make.  We’ve spent the last couple of weeks letting those in our life know, and now I’m sharing it with you! I will miss him terribly, and he  feels the same.  In fact, we both  decided that his mourning period should last about 6 month. We feel that is how long it should  take to get over me.

Okay, I feel that is how long it should take.  He just humors me by agreeing!

yes-yes-yes- yes dear at Did That Just Happen Blog

But, you know what this means?

That’s right.

Online dating is coming!! And you’re coming along for the ride!

You’re welcome. 🙂

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For those runners out there – I’ve complete two races, one virtual and one in real life – both 5k’s.  And now I’m training for a 10k.  I’ve been working on increasing my mileage and I’ve hit week 11 of my training program, after having to take a week off, and then a recovery week – apparently I was pushing myself a bit too hard and my body rebelled!  I’m feeling better, I’m dealing with a medial ankle pain, trying to determine if it’s fallen arch or a nerve – it’s kinda in between the two symptom wise – but RICE is my friend, I’m doing ice compression at least once a day, and twice if I’ve done a run that is 5 or 6 miles long.

Love and missed you guys!

Kate

Here is a Hint

(PS. The “publish” button is right next to the “schedule” button, and I may have just accidentally hit publish, when I meant to hit schedule – so if you got an email or tweet, and it sent you to a blank page, I apologize!!)

Hi guys!!

Just wanted to drop a line and give you a hint of what is coming up in my life!

I hope that doesn’t give away too much!

Enjoy!

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3 Months, 2 Tickets and 1 New Roommate

Happy Pre-Friday everyone!

Twice in the past month I’ve been asked if I miss blogging.  And, I do and I don’t.  So instead of pondering it, I am taking it as a sign and shooting off a quick note to y’all.

1 new roommate.  One of Mr. T’s friends has moved into my guest room.  Over the summer there was no telling who was going to come walking out of that room, but that settled down when one of his friends lost his place to live.  The kid is working and going to school, so I’m happy to provide him a safe place to stay.  No matter how weird it is to have another person in the house!

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2 red light tickets!  Count them, two!  Mr. T is now aware of places where he frequents that have red light cameras.  He and I talked about it, he felt that he has just gotten complacent behind the wheel. I had to giggle, because he is the most conscientious driver I know, the tickets surprised me to no end.  Needless to say, he’s been coming to complete stops here lately!

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3 months… well, I’ve been dating this guy for 3 months.  That still feels weird to say.

Dating. 

But, it’s been fun.  It’s been different.  I’ve enjoyed it. We communicate, a lot.  In a healthy way.  We go get froyo almost every Friday night (frozen yogurt for those that aren’t constantly surrounded by teens and 20 year olds!)  and we go on adventures.  We’ve toured Texas Motor Speedway, and he’s met my family.  Which as you know, my family counts as an adventure some days!

I was emailing a friend the other day, and she was awesome, when I told her that Adam, his name is Adam by the way, and I were in no rush, she goes “I think time and going slow is good for you now. These past couple of years have been such states of transition. You probably are also getting to know yourself in all of these new dynamics.”

Yes, yes I am getting to know myself again.

Speaking of new dynamics.  Mr. T has graduated high school and started college at a small private university downtown.  He knew that he would be living at home his freshman year, so he sold his Expedition and bought a Prius hybrid.  I am so proud of that kid, he saved up his money, he planned ahead knowing that this purchase was coming and he pulled it off!  Since he was commuting, he wanted to save as much money in gas as he could – and even with adding a car payment, the car payment and gas for the Prius was less than gas in the Expedition!  (And the Expedition went to a woman who it was a true blessing for, that was not planned by us, but you could tell there was a Higher Power involved on that deal!)

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Day 2 of college was also his 18th birthday.  My lil’ bit is no longer little.

I’m actually okay with that.

So, that’s my 3, 2, 1.  What’s up with you?

 

And In The End

My life is changing, and It. Is. Awesome!

Which is saying a lot, since I take longer to process change than most!

Since we last spoke I’ve taken a last minute bus ride, 6 hours away, with the best theatre troupe there is, as they got called up to UIL Regionals at the last minute.

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Told them to Break a Leg

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And come back home!

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They made Alternates to State, which is 12th in the State, which is AWESOME!!

Then I went to a concert with some friends

 

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Then I went on a work trip AND crossed an item off my bucket list! My colleague was kind enough to schedule in a little extra time so I could play in the Atlantic Ocean, and now, I have been in both the Pacific and the Atlantic, and you know how I love crossing items off my bucket list!

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I have worked, mailed graduation announcements, oh – did I tell you that Mr. T made the college cheer team?!?

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So proud of this kid!! The coach loves him and I’m about to go return and buy different items to decorate the signing table because he gets to participate at the signing celebration at school!

This also meant that we looked at scholarship and grant money and do we live on campus or at home… there were 2 weeks where the answer was different every time you asked me! In the end, we can maximize the financial money by him living at home Freshman year and then on campus Sophomore year… so as of today, that’s the plan!

I’m getting ready for graduation – but first, they have Prom tomorrow.  Today was Senior Skip Day and someone asked “Is Mr. T participating?” and I was like “He better!” Senior Skip Day is a time-honored tradition!

And, now to the point.  You remember my word of the year, right? FUTURE

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So far, this has been a GREAT year, and I know it will only get better; however, I have higher priorities than blogging right now.  For me, the time is right to stop updating my blog.  But never fear, you can still find me on Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest!  kateandmrt is my handle on most of those, (there should be links to the right) and I’ll still be around, reading your blogs when I can, but for now, I’m halting my own blog.

And it is very bitter sweet. I’ve loved interacting with y’all and we’ve made some great memories and I will miss sharing, often over-sharing, every last detail with you, but it is time for me to focus on other priorities and my Future.  What ever that may be!

I’ll leave you with the wise words from Abraham Lincoln:

Life in your years

Love you,

Kate

Reblog: Then He Kissed the Back of my Hand

Apparently I found the limit on the number of times WordPress will let you reblog one of your own blog posts… Today is the 3rd anniversary of my baby brother’s passing, and so I took some time this morning to re-create the story to share, spend some time with my own thoughts, and just reaffirmed how fast life can change and how important it is to stop and spend time in the moment.

Love you all, and now back to the story.

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My parents always knew that they wanted to have 2 kids and to adopt.  So, after me and my sister, they began looking to adopt.  They wanted to adopt a special needs kid, provide a home to a child that might be overlooked.  They were aware of their own limitations and knew that they wanted a child with a physical handicap.  We took sign language classes together for a while when we thought we were getting a deaf sibling.  That fell through and in the end, we found out about Lee.  Lee had a little red triangle that appeared on his forehead above his nose when he cried and got upset.  The Koreans considered that a handicap.  It was meant to be!

Image<a Lee at Universal Studios, he’s so strong, he is lifting up the A-Team Van with one hand!

His Korean name is Man Ho Ha and we picked him up from Dallas airport when he was 6 months old.  He was ours from the time he was a month old, but we couldn’t get him until he was 6 months old.  It was amazing.  A Korean woman had traveled with him and several other babies and dropped them off at other stops, and Lee and one other child, a little girl, were her last stop.  We passed him around our arms while at the airport and just couldn’t keep our eyes or hands off of him.  It was a memory that will always stay with me.

He was named Jayman Lee.  Jayman is spelled slightly different from normal so that we could incorporate his Korean name in there – and Lee is a family name.  We just called him Lee.

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Through the years, as a good older sister does, I tormented him! I curled his hair and my other sister dressed him up.  Good Times!  Since there is 10 years difference between he and I, we were pretty close.  When he got older, I always took him school supply shopping.  We had season passes to Six Flags for many years.  Apparently, when he and I were younger, I thought I was also his mom.  He would bring home papers from school that were subpar and needed a parents signature, in order to keep him out of trouble I would sign his papers.  Then mom and dad would never know that he didn’t do well.  Yeah, uh, they found out anyway.

It was 10 months ago that he was diagnosed with viral cardiomyopathy.  You have followed my journey with him here on my blog.  After the initial diagnosis, he did good.  We had a few set backs, but overall, he was doing really well managing the condition.  We did have a few scares along the way, but he always pulled through.  In fact, our aunt commented at a family function “you don’t look sick.”  Yeah, she’s that aunt.

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A little over a month ago he started not feeling very well.  His meds were adjusted, but he knows is body, and he knew when it was time to go to the ER.

He never left the hospital again.

This kid was amazing.  He took everything that was thrown at him.  We didn’t think he would survive the gallbladder surgery, but he did.  Then he was transferred to UT Southwestern, which is one of the best hospitals for cardiovascular issues.  He seemed to be getting better, but then stopped.  I can’t tell you how many times we were told “he may not make it through the night” but he did.  When he went in for his LVAD surgery, again, we knew he might not survive, but against the odds, he did.  I’m so very proud of my brother for all that he went through and how well he handled it.

There was a Tuesday that I went to visit him in Dallas.  He took my hand and held it.  He told me how much he loved me and how glad he was that I was his sister.  He said that he knows how much crap I put up from him over the years and he was so glad that I was always there to support him.  He also mentioned how thankful he was that I could spend so much time with him in the hospital.  He acknowledged that it couldn’t have been easy for me, but that he wanted me to know how much he appreciated it, and me, and how very much he loved me.

Then he kissed the back of my hand and sat there holding my hand.

That’s the last conversation I had with my brother.

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Lee with our nephew

That night he had to be put on the ventilator.  A week later he coded and slipped into a coma.  This Monday, he had a CT scan and we were told that there was swelling in the brain due to damage and that the doctors would not be able to fix that.

It was time.

This Tuesday we gathered by his bedside.  Mom, dad, my sister, my grandmother and I.  We held his hand, kissed his head and said our goodbyes.  When we were ready, we called in the doctors and nurses and they turned off his machines and left us in peace.  We stood by and talked to him, held his hand and we cried as he passed away.

Lee transitioned peacefully to Heaven surrounded by love.  We let him know how much of a blessing he was to us, and that we were letting him go.  He didn’t take long to pass, and we all knew when it happened, you could see the peaceful expression, it was so nice that after such a trying journey, he had found peace.

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Last picture of me and Lee, at the hospital

Today we have been busy making the arrangements.  Lee will be cremated and we will have a memorial service this Saturday morning.  I’ve been in contact with family and friends and have been absolutely amazed at the outpouring of love and support I have received.

Lee was well loved, and for a pain in the butt brother, he was pretty darn awesome.

Thank you all for being part of my journey with Lee.