This weekend I had to attend a baby shower. I say that I “had” to because it was a social obligation and I literally had to make myself get dressed and get out the door. I really didn’t want to go.
Don’t let the cuteness of the invite fool you – it’s torture!
Reason 1: I hate baby showers. I hate bridal showers. I just hate that stuff. And, I’m telling you now, if it is an event with a lot of people bringing me presents, I will announce that I am not going to bore them and make them sit there while I open every single one, but that I really appreciate the time they took to celebrate with me – now let’s eat. I don’t like being the center of attention and it is boring for everyone involved to sit there and have people watch you open presents – or as you sit and watch others. I’d much rather we mingle and have fun!
Thank goodness we didn’t have this – cause I wouldn’t be able to actually eat the baby’s innards. Really? Who does this stuff? I don’t want to eat what is portrayed as a baby!!
Reason 2: The mother-to-be lied. Now, this is a grey area. They (the parents) wanted to do a “gender reveal” at the shower. Which, fine, whatever makes you happy you should do; however, it makes it so much more difficult to shop when you don’t know the gender of the baby, and because of this, I cut my gift giving budget in half – and I only gave diapers and wipes. But, here’s the deal. When they were asked if they know the sex, they both said “no, we don’t know”. We all knew they were lying. Well, several of us knew they were lying. Why did they have to lie? Why couldn’t they say “Yes, we know, but we want to have a gender reveal shower and let everyone know at the same time – surprise everyone.” And, if that was the case, then those of us that were buying gifts could have the option to buy a gift AFTER we knew the sex of the child. Also, if they were going to do a gender reveal shower, then it should have been themed like that. But, since the parents to be didn’t let the organizers know, then it couldn’t be planned as such. I’ve seen tons of great ideas for a gender reveal shower, but instead of going for it and embracing it – they just lied. (And they got a lot of clothes, but 90% were “boy” clothes).
Okay, I can get behind he or she themed items that involve chocolate!!
I am pleased to announce that I had a good attitude! I chipped in, participated in the games (I didn’t win any, though – and I really tried!!) (But, one of my BFF’s was the host, and she had an extra gift left over because it took forever to open gifts and we decided the last game wasn’t needed and as I was leaving, I noticed that the extra gift was in my purse. Oh yeah, my friends love me!) (I don’t think anyone else at the shower will read this, but if you were there, just disregard the previous sentence!)
Really? You want to display and then eat a cake that is a baby’s butt? Am I the only one that has issues with this??
So, non-optional social conventions aside (you’ll get this if you watch The Big Bang Theory!), it was a good weekend. The baby shower didn’t suck, which is a huge compliment coming from me! My BFF and her mom did a great job putting it together, excellent food, wonderful punch and they kept it rolling right along.
Of course, the day before, when I was finally getting around to getting the gift, I texted my girlfriend “Is it wrong to put in the card “good luck raising this baby without shopping at Target or Walmart?'” She laughed and said “yes”. It’s not my fault that the mom to be only registered at a crazy place that is not common because “I don’t like Target or WalMart” Uh huh. You don’t like it, huh? Let’s see how long that lasts before reality hits.
She’s having a girl, by the way… I know you were dying to find out.
But, the baby shower didn’t suck!
This post is hilarious! I love the pics! Yeah, I don’t like to hold parties either. But in the end, they usually end up fine.
Lol, thanks! I can handle most parties, but baby showers tend to be painful!!
I’m right there with you on hating baby showers. No, I am not chipping in to buy your breast pump. You are on your own for that one.
No joke!!! Too true!!
My baby shower is this Sunday and I am excited to see everyone, we have some friends from school coming and since they are coming from out of town spouses are coming too. I knew from the start I wanted my husband there and some of our guy friends. We are having it at the restaurant my parents work at and it’s an open bar, beer and wine only though its a Sunday morning for crying out loud :). Yes we have the fruit baby watermelon but no baby butt cake, although my mom wanted it. It’s going to be a large shower since I have a big family (45 people) but all in all I can’t wait to see everyone. I will admit though I would rather open our gifts at home, I don’t want to bore people and I might want to take my time to look at some of the things, however I don’t know how to tell people that, and don’t want to offend anyone since I know reatives who like to watch things being opened. No games either, just a raffle for some gifts. Hope my shower isn’t boring!
LOL – it sounds like yours won’t be too boring! With that many people there it will take 2 hours to open gifts!! You’ll either have to blow through them (and you should have one volunteer to take notes of who gave you what and another one just to snag the bags, tissue paper and wrapping paper to put in one sack for saving (bags and tissue paper if you are into that) and a garbage bag for the discarded wrapping papers! You’ll also need someone to take the new gifts and put them in a bag and someone willing to move all of the big gifts out of the way immediately like the cases of diapers and the diaper genie and such! 🙂
Or, you very politely make an announcement that you are so very happy that everyone came and you want to spend time with them and fellowship with them and will be opening the presents after you get home, as they are all lovely, but you value their time more! 🙂
LOL – I’m just spouting off at the mouth – all that really matters is Congratulations!! I’m happy for you and good luck!
Haha at my baby shower I announced I wouldn’t open gifts in front of everyone as I didn’t want to bored them and I got so many moans of disappointment I had to do it!!! Those people are weird. I think watching someone open a gazillion gifts is about the most boring thing ever!!!!
I agree! It’s worse when the person opening the gifts is super slow.. not kidding when I tell you I had to sit on my hands in order to keep myself from reaching over to help rip the paper off! LOL.
Lol love it!
No walmart or target? REALLY???
That’s what I said! Well, actually what I said was “you are so screwed!” Lol.
This cracked me up, the first post I read on your blog and I couldn’t stop laughing! Thank you for sharing it with us…for the record, I loathe these things too! Great post!
Thanks! I’m glad you stopped by and that you enjoyed it! I’m happy to have found out that I’m not the only one that can’t stand those things – based on what I see on Pinterest, I figured all the women in the world were going to gang up and make me turn in my girl-card! LOL
Hahaha a girl card violation…I am right there with you! I went to this one baby shower…I kid you not…it lasted six hours, I was literally being held there against my will all for the sake of the pyrex dish I took a dessert in! Then when the lady opened her gifts, she put them in piles of what was good enough for her little bundle of stuck up joy and what was going back to the store…I was like wow…glad I only got you a gift card for Baby r us….she didn’t want Walmart and Target items to EVER touch her precious child…yeah okay..four kids later and she is shopping at good will…just saying 🙂
Rock on!!! I love when life comes back and bites those kinds of people on the bum!! I laughed at the shower when I made mention of the fact that she wasn’t going to shop at Target or Wal-Mart, and she was already back tracking from her previous “I don’t like them” statement to, “well, Target is okay, but not Wal-Mart.” I just smirked. She’ll learn soon enough. 🙂
Yes it has a way of doing that…just because you think your first should be outfitted in osh kosh b gosh and baby channel, doesn’t mean that in a few months when you actually notice the price of diapers and formula, that you won’t be running to Walmart as fast as possible 🙂 So enjoying reading through your blog!
Turning a negative into a positive! Do guys ever have to go to baby showers? I hope not.
Guys were invited – but they all hung outside. I can’t you how much I wanted to be a guy that day…
I’m right there with you. You would have loved my baby shower. No dumb games and we had the party at Carrabas -everyone drank and ate good Italian food. Nothing all cute and baby butt cakes.
Now THAT’S a baby shower!! I would have loved that one!
I can’t stand baby showers either. The cute overload makes me gag. And quite frankly, like the baby butt cake, some of it is disturbing, disgusting, or just idiotic! I like the idea of giving a Target or Walmart gift card for the first birthday 🙂
Preach on!! I’m telling you, it’s just gotten out of hand!! And yeah, that gift card idea was the bomb! I so have to do that!
We use the “non-optional social conventions” line a lot in the Madhouse since we’re unconventional by nature. And no, eating a baby’s butt, no matter how much sugar is involved, does not appeal to me either.
Thank goodness! I look around at some of this stuff and go “that’s not cute and sweet – it’s sadistic!!!”
🙂 I love the line “non-optional social convention”, it applies way too often!!
You might have liked my baby shower…it was at a bar! haha! We did it there because our good friends own a bar and they let me use the dining area for the shower on a Saturday morning so I didn’t have to rent a room somewhere. I wasn’t drinking obviously but many of the ladies ordered drinks and my husband, Dad and a few other guys sat up at the bar! Also, I can’t imagine eating that cake with the baby butt on it!
Nice!! That would have been a fun spot to have a shower – and while I don’t drink much, I probably would have felt better if I’d had that option! LOL.
And I’m so glad that I’m not the only one that doesn’t want to eat a baby’s butt! I’m pretty twisted, but even to me that’s just gross!!
Glad it didnt suck. Im glad those things are for women.
Sigh… yeah, the few men that came (as afterwards it was a bbq and pool party that I didn’t stay for) hung out with the kids in the pool. I was so jealous…
SO, why didn’t you stay for the good part?
I was already to get away from it all – and I had “forgotten” to bring meat for the BBQ and I just wanted to grab some take out and go home and have dinner with Mr. T! I did my part and participated, but wasn’t going to stay – I knew that from the beginning!
Next time, maybe you can conveniently go late.
I totally sympathize with the shower thing. For the baby’s first birthday, you should give her a gift card to Target, Walmart and K-Mart.
Lol!!! YES!!! That’s just brilliant!! Thanks! 🙂